Marriage – An Eternal Tradition or A Thing of the Past?

I realize that marriage is not dead. There are plenty of people who get married every day, every week, around the world. But, why does it feel like fewer and fewer people are interested? Why do I continue to hear people in their twenties and thirties swear off marriage? Maybe this only applies to those living in the U.S. Maybe if I were to ask someone in Papua New Guinea or Sweden, the sentiment would be far different.

3 years ago I recognized my desire to make a documentary film about marriage. I’m not yet married, but I plan to be someday. As I’ve reflected on what I value about it for my personal life, my inclination has also been to speak with others about their beliefs, fears, losses, joys, and hopes related to the topic.

I’m compiling material and research on the subject from essays, self-improvement books, film and television, academic research, and yes, personal contacts. Don’t worry, I’m not going to reveal any private information here in a way that identifies people. That will only be in the case of the film with a subject’s permission. At any rate, there is a lot to say about marriage and I have only begun to wrap my mind around this immense topic. My goal here is to start and carry on a conversation, an exploration. We’ll see where it takes us.

Going back to my question: Why does it feel like fewer and fewer people are interested? This seems to be an accurate perception, but I’m open to being wrong. Maybe the articles I read, the comments I overhear, and the conversations I have (sometimes brief) are not truly reflecting the state of our society. It could be that I’m narrow-minded and intolerant. Whatever the reality, my curiosity has been piqued. I’ve decided that I’ll start exploring answers for my film by traveling closer to home in the U.S. Then I’ll see about traveling abroad. And in the meantime, I’m investigating right here while siting in the comforts of my home. I look forward to learning from all who join this unfolding conversation.

2 comments

  1. ericmondschein · December 18, 2013

    I cannot answer the question why people are not getting married. I have been married now for over 43 years. My wife and I married when she she was 19 and I had just turned 20. It has not been easy, marriage is real work. The love makes the work easier, but do not kid yourself, it is work, compromise and putting the other before one’s self. I just know that I would do it again in a heart beat.

    • Searching for Marriage · December 18, 2013

      Thank you for sharing about your experience and your faith in marriage. Do you share my observation that people are less interested in marriage these days? I live in the U.S., so my current insights mostly pertain to those living here.

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